my favorite existential detective

he's everywhere.



"you'll spy...
-yes.
on me...
-yes.
will you be spying on me in the bathroom?
-yes.
in the bathroom?
-yes.
why?
-there's nothing too small....we might see you floss, or masturbate. that could be the key to your reality.
so i'm hiring you to spy on me...."

"have you ever transcended space and time?
-yes. no. uh, time not space. no, I don't know what you are talking about."